“So I was thinking about relationships and about how it pertains to songs about relationships. And I figured out the key to a relationship and how to make it work. Check it out, this is a tip from your uncle John.
When you first meet somebody, you find out they like you. First of all, a friend of a friend of theirs say, he or she really really likes you, and it kills you, floors you, sends you to the ground, you’ve got to pick yourself up off the ground. Then you get their phone number and you call them up and you say ‘Yeah, that’s a really great phone conversation, can I see you some time?’ and then they say 'I’d like that’. Nothing feels better than 'I’d like that’.
So now your blood pressure is going, you’re six feet off the ground, you can’t sleep because of 'I’d like that’. So then you hang out for a while, and you call and you talk on the phone all the time. Then you drop the bomb, what feels like the bomb, you say, 'You know what, I’ve been thinking about you a lot’. And she goes, 'Ahhhhhhh!’ And you go 'What happened?’ and she goes, 'I’m sorry, I just, I just, I just, that’s, I’ve been thinking about you too’. BAM. Higher into the sky. But now 'I’d like that’ is done. Now you’re up to 'I’m thinking about you’.
Then however number of months pass, it makes you feel comfortable saying it, you say 'I gotta tell you something’. They go 'What?’, you go 'I’m in love with you’. And nothing in the world sounds better than 'I’m in love with you’. And then maybe she starts crying, or maybe he goes *gasp*. And all the sudden you’re like 'I’m in’. But now what doesn’t work? 'I’d like that’ and 'I’ve been thinking about you’. Now we’re at 'I’m in love with you’.
Then maybe someday it’ll move up to 'I love you’. Fast forward; now you’re like 'I love you a lot; I love you more than anything in life’. Now 'I love you’ doesn’t work. It’s a threshold that keeps moving up. Fast forward; like six months, six weeks, whatever the case may be, now you’re on like, 'I want to marry you’, 'I want to impregnate you with my love’, 'I wanna, I wanna just send my love to you’. Damn it, words don’t work anymore. And then you say this line - and you know, you know you’ve used this line before - 'I just wish they’d put a new word in the dictionary bigger than love because love just doesn’t describe what I feel’.
So now he or she starts asking, 'Do you love me?’ and you start going, 'Of course I love you’. 'Well say it’. Then it becomes 'Say it twice’. And it goes 'Say it three times’.
And then, you cross a really interesting point, where all the sudden it becomes 'I hate you, I hate you’. And you go, 'Oh my god she hates me’. Now it’s like 'I hate you more than anything’. And then it’s like 'We’re over’. And then they go 'No we’re not’ And you go 'Yes we are’. Now the words completely do not work at all, you’re left with nothing. You’re throwing punches under water. You’re done. You know what the moral of that story is (if there is one)? Never, ever, ever, ever underestimate the power of 'I’d like that’"